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Overdressed in a gay Recife sex sauna?

But practically naked in Recife beach Boa Viagem!

By Suzy Size, your glorious guide to gay Recife and Brazil

The rainbow flag is flying high in Recife
Sexy Recife gay boys found under the rainbow
How the hell, could your horny heroine loose almost all her shirts, pants and underwear over night? She woke up one morning in gay friendly Recife beach - practically naked!

On the other hand she was reprimanded for being overdressed by a guardian of public morals in the so private quarters of Termas Boa Vista, the well known Recife gay sex sauna!

A strange world and tons of Recife conundrums, indeed, but let your humbled heroine start this episode in a proper way:

Patricia Highheels, the good old buddy of Suzy Size, had written another of her almost historic e-mails to your travelling heroine when she just had arrived at hotel Aconchego, 250 meters away from Boa Viagem beach of Recife. The reception and restaurant area of said hotel looked strangely familiar to Miss Size, not unlike a déjà vu. But Suzy was now fully distracted by the revelations of Patricia:

The entrance of gay Recife sauna Termas Boa Vista
Probably the best sauna for people like us of Recife
”My dearest Suzy,

whilst in Recife you must visit Termas Boa Vista at any price, even though this gay sauna heaven is a bit difficult to find. Our taxi driver had a lot of problems, apparently he was apparently not one of us. Naldo and I liked it there very much. Besides money boys there are sections without them within the premises. We quickly got acquainted with a black hunk called Tyson (nomen est omen) who was sweet and tender. He invited us to join him after work and go to the old center of Recife where they have every Tuesday a "terça-feira negra", a festival with black music, lots of food and an ocean of beer.

Of course we wanted to go there and agreed to take along some friends of his from the sauna. In the end, we were a company of nine and had to hire two taxis to reach the place. Some more boys joined us there, the most handsome one brought along his girlfriend, who knows that he works as a money boy and is glad, he does not fool around with other women…

Alessandro was with us as well: He is the only real bottom boy at sauna Boa Vista and works there for over ten years already. His duty is to introduce the mainly bisexual or straight boys to gay sex. They have to fuck him and he explains them the different techniques and positions etc… Amazing, what one can learn travelling in Brazil.

After that infamous Recife sauna: Violence at the Black Tuesday Festival

The Black Tuesday Festival takes place on a large square with a stage in the middle where bands play. Around the stage there are countless open air restaurants where plenty of food and hectoliters of beer are available. We were glad to be there with Tyson and some other strong guys. There was a fight not far from us and one got stabbed with a knife. The perpetrator was still walking around, trying to check whether or not he had done a successful job. One of our companions took a look at the victim and told us he was nearly dead. Tyson forbade me to look after the victim or even to get up which was far too dangerous for a white guy. He protected us perfectly well, almost like a mother. 40 minutes later the ambulance arrived and took the dead body with them. The police did not show up at all.

When everything calmed down, Tyson lead us to another fun place nearby where the drinking and reveling went on. Besides the tragic incident it was great fun, even though I had to pay the whole huge bill (as expected), luckily I had my credit card with me.”

Juicy male asses in Recife
The boys sit in gay Recife Boa Viagem beach
Look, gay traveler to Recife and Brazil, your heroine did not want to see this Black Tuesday Festival for different reasons. After the vivid description of Patricia Highheels she had a pretty clear idea about that ecstatic event already. And it rained dogs and cats almost every day during her week in Recife which is poison for every open air fiesta and crusing in general. Last, but not least, how could Suzy experience anything that would top murder? The both frightening and exciting account of Patricia Highheels must therefore do.

But your horny heroine most certainly wanted to go to Termas Boa Vista, a Brazilian gay sauna with boys which certainly looked like a heaven for people like us in Recife.

Suzy Size left hotel Aconchego early evening and took a bus to Boa Vista. When the bus reached a square that looked quite lively, your heroine went off, but that square proved to be not so lively at all at closer observation. There were no taxis to bring her to Termas Boa Vista, so Suzy boarded another bus going to the hopefully real center of Boa Vista, but the bus went on and on. When your heroine again left that strange bus she was completely lost. Finally she found a taxi that brought her back to her Recife hotel Aconchego – in five minutes: Your confused heroine must have mistaken that second bus which was going to Boa Vista with one that went to Boa Viagem and returned right to the neighborhood she started from.

Remember Sisyphus?

Sexy bicycle man in Recife beach
Is he available for gay fun in the beach?
Well, luckily there is always a next day, at least as long as we are alive. So Suzy Size took another bus to Boa Vista and got off in an area that looked a bit lively. Here she boarded a taxi which brought her in about four minutes to her apparently very nearby destination, Termas Boa Vista in Rua Dom Manoel Pereira. Your horny heroine soon found a muscular black guy and went with him to one of the suites. He turned out to be devotedly into rimming and had a hard cock whilst he was serving Miss Size in that back department with his diligent tongue. Look, gay traveler to the world, Suzy Size never forces (or asks) any of the boys to lick her ass, but when there are happy volunteers?

Why be more Catholic than the Pope?

Your heroine returned two more times to Thermas Boa Vista during that week in Recife. Once she had a guy called Christiano (Ronaldo, he added, as a joke) who reminded her not little of Nacho in Buenos Aires, having the same coffee brown skin. After the action, he did quality control and asked Miss Size whether or not she was satisfied? He said, he liked “happy customers” which is certainly a sign of good corporate governance at Termas Boa Vista, probably due to that careful job training at said Recife gay sauna with boys.

A natural phallus in Recife
What do you think if you see that tree?
Another victim of Miss Size was a hunky blond guy. He was openly straight or “ativo”, but added in the sales talk to be “muito liberal” (very liberal). Your noisy heroine had just to know what that meant and he turned out to be (at least!) a good kisser and for a short time allowed one finger up his ass.

A gay sauna guardian of public morals

A rather odd occurrence happened during the last visit at Termas Boa Vista when your sex greedy heroine suddenly was reprimanded for being overdressed. In all innocence she had entered a darkroom she knew quite well from her previous visits – if it is possible at all, to know any darkroom well - when suddenly an employee of the sauna told her to leave that tempting darkness at once. He turned out to be some sort of a gay guardian of public morals. That night this dark room was to be entered naked only, a fact (and sign) that your naïve heroine had overseen in her sex greed. She still wore a towel around her waist and that was almost a criminal act, at least that night, in said place. So Suzy Size handed her towel to that strict guardian and finally could return to that tempting darkness, no longer being overdressed for the occasion.

Gay customers are welcome at Churrascaria Ponteio
If you like meat in Recife you should come here
Several times whilst in Recife, your meat hungry heroine went to Ponteio, a famous Churrascaria in Boa Viagem beach, about a thirty minutes walk away from her hotel. They have a fabulous buffet with 50 types of salads, seafood and sushi and their employees walk around with meat spades and offer the guests tons of meats of all kind. Funny enough, when some Swiss friends in Recife invited your heroine for dinner, they took her right back to Ponteio again…

As Suzy said before, it rained a lot during that week in Recife and parts of the city were more than once flooded with smelly sewage water from the dysfunctional canalization. So your heroine sat often in the covered coffee shop at hotel Aconchego besides to pool and wrote about three masterful pieces for Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World. That feeling of déjà vu Miss Size had felt when she first entered her hotel became stronger and stronger. But she still did not know, why?

By the way Dominique Strauss-Kahn would not have fallen of grace, if he had stayed at hotel Aconchego in Recife. Once when an older chamber maid was cleaning the room, Suzy Size entered and the maid immediately left. Then reception called and told your clueless heroine, it was hotel policy, not to allow guests into the room whilst they were being cleaned.

This was their policy, long before the New York incident that did lead to the steep downfall of the once so powerful man.

Sexy football player in Recife beach
You should see his godly ass
When the rain paused for a while Suzy Size went to the Recife beach of Boa Viagem and watched sexy guys jogging or playing games. When she saw this guy with his extremely juicy ass it all came back: Semi senile Suzy Size had once been in Recife before, about 25 years ago. And she had picked up a super sexy guy here at this very beach. The bearer of this rear of the year here in the very same spot of the beach could well be a clone or son or miraculous duplication of that other guy: judging just by the ass.

Recife: Kissing gay guys under water

And now Suzy Size suddenly remembered other details very vividly: She had first kissed with that guy then under water. It was a bit a salty business, but you must forgive your then so youthful and silly heroine who tried many things that seem to be foolish in retrospect. Then – you cannot kiss for ever under water in the shark infested sea of Recife – Miss Size had taken that bearer of that juicy ass right to her quarters at hotel Aconchego!

Nowadays this is no longer possible without registering your companion from the start, as another gay guest at this hotel had done. Suzy, when writing besides the pool, had more than once completely undressed that sexy guy (the youthful companion of the old tart) with her eyes.

This Recife laundry strips her customers naked
Where Suzy Size lost her last shirt
Suzy Size would categorize Boa Viagem beach as gay friendly (cruisy) and she is quite sure she could have made a catch or two, if the weather had been any better. But – also due to that permanent rain – your heroine suffered a severe loss: She lost practically all her clothes! She woke up, one morning in her Bo Viagem beach hotel, practically naked, but did not know yet what had happened to her.

Naturally it was raining again when your heroine took her famous umbrella and walked to the nearby “lavendaria” (laundry shop) she had deposited 11 shirts, 9 pieces of underwear and 2 pairs of pants two days earlier. She was supposed to pick up her stuff that very morning, before the shop would close down for an extended holiday.

But there was a sign at the door that they had closed early due to a power shortage the afternoon before and they were not opening up again before several days.

That is how your heroine practically lost her last shirt, most of her clothing, in Recife.

The flight to Fortaleza was scheduled for that very evening and Miss Size was on board, nearly naked.

Readers Comments
2887 Rudyard 18 Jun 11
I love this article. It seems Suzy now does not need any prodding from her avid readers to reveal juicy details (without going over the top!!).
Does Patricia give out personal tourist info to Suzy's readers? I will be visiting Zurich in Sept or Oct and would like to get in touch with her.

2888 Ian, London 18 Jun 11
Everyone loves a good mystery story, Suzy. Luckily in this marvellous one, at least it was only your wardrobe that went to a better place...

2896 Eduard 20 Jun 11
...and Miss Size was on board, nearly naked, if not for her glorious mink coat! You are very entertaining dear.

3488 Michael 13 Jan 12
Recife might be the WORST city in Brazil. I had never seen so many UGLY people in one city. Most of them are fatties or skiny, and hairys, no fit guys. Don't waste you time there.




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