Lingas and temples, bananas and cocktails - Gay Cambodia comes out

There is a growing gay scene in Phnom Penh and Siem Reap

By Roberto Primavera

Maybe Ky is 37. Maybe he is only 33. The Cambodian does not know his date of birth. He was only a little child when the Red Khmer seized power and killed in the four years of their terror reign 2 million people. Amongst them the entire family of Ky. Only he and a younger sister survived the murderous regime of Pol Pot. Nobody alive remembers his date of birth. No records give evidence to the birth of Ky.

Somehow, Ky made it to a refugee camp in Thailand where the Red Cross took care of him and found him a foster family in New Zealand. In New Zealand Ky attended school, studied, had is first job, found out he was gay. After the death of Pol Pot in 1998 Cambodia embarked on the long journey of rebuilding the country. Ky in Kiwi land felt the urge to contribute to this process. He left New Zealand for Cambodia where he worked for the government. Feeling appalled, though, by the ubiquitous corruption, he quit the job. He started his own business instead and wrote history. Four years ago, he opened in Siem Reap the fabulous boutique hotel Golden Banana - the first openly gay enterprise in post-war Cambodia.

Siem Reap is the gateway to the temples of Angkor from Cambodia's heydays as a cultural hub as political and military power in the region some 800 - 1000 years ago. Contemporary Cambodia is back on the tourist map with Angkor Wat, the Bayou temple with its enigmatic stone faces or Ta Prohm as its major draws, whose photogenic and atmospheric combination of trees growing out of the ruins and the surrounding jungle served as film set for Tomb Raider with Angelina Jolie. A must is a side trip to the "River of 1000 Lingas". The creators of Angkor Wat have carved a huge number of Lingas (whether there a really a thousand remains to be counted) into the rocky river bed. Lingas were the phallic symbol of the Hindu god Shiva whom Angkor Wat was dedicated.

There is no shortage of accommodations of all sorts from backpacker joints with bulk beds to luxury five-star-hotels. Internet cafes with fast connections are plenty and laptop users will enjoy WiFi in cafes like the gay friendly Blue Pumpkin (which looks like the Latte-and-Cake-sister of the Bed Supper Club in Bangkok), the gay Linga Bar or boutique hotels like the Golden Banana. Surely but slowly, the war torn country becomes just an ordinary developing county with tourism as a major money earner. 1.8 Million people visited Cambodia last year and almost all of them toured Siem Reap and Angkor.

Getting there and getting around is as easy as pie. From Malaysia and Thailand AirAsia flies to Cambodia and from Singaporean the low budget carrier Jetstarasia. Busses connect Phnom Penh, Siem Reap and the still somehow tacky seaside resort Sihanoukville. Air links between these cities are available though not really worth the money, unless you are on a Cambodia-in-48-hours-tour. The most pleasant way, though, to travel between Phnom Penh and Siem Reap is the 5 hours speedboat cruise over the Tonle Sap River and lake. The boats themselves are a bit dirty and smelly. However, you can sit in the bows or even better on the roof and watch rural Cambodian passing by. Fishermen catching fish, water buffalos taking a bath, busy floating villages, plus palm trees, rice paddies, temples and mosques are an Asia picture-perfect.

Siem Reap is Cambodia's boomtown. Hotels, restaurants, bars, spas are mushrooming. Only four, five years ago, Siem Reap was nothing but a sleepy provincial town. Now it sports one of the best urban nightlife in Southeast Asia. No wonder that there is also gay life blossoming. Right in the middle of it all is the fabulous gay "Linga Bar" of Martin Dishman. The American serves great cocktails such as "Linga Storm" or "Cocksucking Cowboy" and perfectly chilled beers. Right across the Linga Bar is the other half of Martin's little Linga empire: The One, which is according to Martin the worlds smallest five star hotel. It has only one luxury room plus a roof garden. One night in The One sets you back 250 USD, the unofficial Cambodian currency.

Although it is an open secret that Cambodia's king is a PLU (People Like Us) nobody talks publicly about the sexual orientation of king, who was before his coronation in 2004 in Phnom Penh a ballet dancer in Paris. Homosexuality is still a taboo in Cambodia. "They have no clue about homosexuality, thus they are not really biased towards gays", Ky says about his fellow Cambodians. "The attitude towards sexuality, though, is as relaxed as it is in Thailand."

Only last October Sokha and his Thai boyfriend Oak have opened in the vicinity of the Royal Palace Phnom Penh's second gay bar "Blue Chilli" which is distinctly a hang out for local gay Khmer. Until then the trendy "Salt Lounge" at Sisowath Quay was the first and only gay bar, though not the only gay business in town. The hotel "Manor House" is gay owned and managed and so is stylish wellness spa and beauty paradise "OSPA".

Once a week Janna hangs out at the Blue Chilli. He would love to go there more often, but he can't afford it. His job in a guesthouse earns him 70 USD a month. This is not too bad, though, in a country where a teacher or a police officer makes 35 Dollar a month. Yet even 70 Dollar are not enough to live on when you have to pay 30 Dollar rent a month for a room and the litre gas for your motorbike costs 1 dollar. Now wonder that 1,50 USD for a beer at the Blue Chilli are fortune for local gays (of whom a lot identify themselves rather as bisexuals than as gay).

Janna could make some money on the side if he would charge for sex. Yet Janna doesn't like that. "I did ask money for sex", the 25 year old says. "Not any more. I didn't like it." Cambodians are very proud people.