A love tragedy in Colombo

The merciless trains (sometimes) leave too punctually in Sri Lanka

By Suzy Size, gay Sri Lanka

Imagine this: Suzy Size is sitting in the only first class compartment of a Kandy bound train in the Colombo Fort Station. Besides her in the isle seat is Magna Size, her older sister, who does not yet sense the tragic events just unfolding. In the row in front of your heroine are Amorn, the boyfriend of so many years and Sun, the heartthrob of Magna. Mr. Iflar, a gay Sri Lankan man, has just passed by the open window outside and discreetly handed a neatly folded piece of paper to your stunned heroine. Besides his phone number the note contains an unmistakable message: “I love you.” Written on the back of an ATM receipt of Mamanella Branch. But, alas, time has run out, the merciless train leaves punctually at 15.35 hours as scheduled. Suzy Size discretely waves back at devastated Mr. Iflar who looks sad, incredibly sad.

It is raining a bit.

The sky must be sad as well.

Two days earlier the party of four had landed at the airport in Colombo around midnight. The return flight with Cathay Pacific was slightly under 9000 Baht per person. Neither Thais nor Farangs need a visa for Sri Lanka. A taxi brought them to the famous Galle Face Hotel which was founded in the middle of the nineteenth century. They had booked an inexpensive room (without view) for 63 US Dollars. Where in the world can you live in Colonial splendor for that kind of money? If you cannot stay there, just visit this unique hotel of a bygone time for a drink at the Terrace or enjoy a buffet lunch, dinner or High Tea. It is well worth the effort.

The 26 year old civil war – which prevented or hindered almost all economic development and thus preserved places like the Galle Face Hotel in its slightly worn out charms - has ended in March of 2009 when the government wiped out the Tamil Tigers. But Colombo is still like under siege, there are military control posts all over the city, there were many bomb attacks in the past. Colombo is not a beautiful place, there are some old Colonial buildings, but you do not want to walk around much.

But the first day they just tried that. Suzy and Magna love to walk whereas Amorn and Sun – typically for Thais - are strongly opposed to any such weird undertakings. One could catch a suntan! Or one might sweat! And one will get very tired! They headed for the Fort Train Station to look for a train to Kandy. You may have heard, gay sex tourist to the world, that they have a tooth of Lord Buddha at the temple in Kandy. And that tooth got Khun Amorn interested in a trip to a strange place like Sri Lanka. Khun Sun was very skeptical and hesitant at first, but then graciously agreed to leave the safe grounds of Thailand for a dubious land like Sri Lanka when he heard about the Casinos in Colombo. But he probably could not be fooled again, since that Stardust Casino visited lacked all star qualities and was certainly not up to the very high standards of that distinguished Isarn boy. Or is it girl?

Walking the streets of Colombo in search of Fort Train Station, all eyes of the Sri Lankan men turned after Khun Amorn and Khun Sun, leaving Suzy and Magna Size bitterly unattended. They all knew exactly what those two Thais were representing with ardor. In a land where homosexuality is illegal – that silly law was superimposed by the British – but bisexuality is more or less the norm amongst younger men, though not spoken about, our two friends were very bold and flamboyant indeed. The show went on street by street, one head turned after the other, but needless to say, your four brave sentinels to gay Sri Lanka never reached that Fort Train Station by foot, they lost their way and boarded a Tuk Tuk in the end. At the train station they bought four first class thickets for next day at 400 Rupees each (about 4 US Dollars) for the three hours ride that is very scenic.

As usual Suzy and her funny group arrived early at the train station. When the train arrived, they took their reserved seats at the not air conditioned compartment. Khun Amorn and Khun Sun were seated right in front of the panoramic window. When Magna came back into the car from a last smoke, Suzy asked her elder sister to have a look on her many bags containing all the frocks and fur coats, it can get cold in Kandy. The train was going to leave in a little while and Suzy wanted to have a pee. When your benign heroine entered the toilet a very fat and ugly guy with beard pointed out a toilet for her. Suzy entered and started to pee when the face of said man appeared on the other side through a little window separating the two urinals. He stared at the cock of your heroine, his tongue made wild movements between his lips and he was obviously jerking off. Well, beauty certainly lies in the eye of the beholder.

When Suzy was safely back in her train seat, the ugly guy was standing at the wall opposite her window. He tried to make eye contact all the times. Then he wrote something on a piece of paper. Suzy pointed to Khun Amorn in front of her, conveying, she was with somebody, using her boyfriend as a shield. But the guy just came over and discretely slipped a piece of paper into the hand of Suzy. Not even Magna noticed anything. When Suzy read the mysterious message of Mr. Iflar it read:

”I love you.”

”I like fuck with you.”

Suzy had sensed that.

Of course, your heroine felt pity for Mr. Iflar who found your graying heroine so sensational.

But what could she do?

He was not her type at all.

The minutes till the train finally left felt like eternity.

Suzy was so glad she was safely on her way to Kandy.

Suzy Size will travel to gay Kandy now. Read next week exclusively on Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World about that very important trip through gay Sri Lanka.

Support the Suzy Size World Friendship Tour – pay on-line now

It feels so good to do good

Suzy Size likes her tours all over the world so much, she now plans to go on an eternal World Friendship Tour for Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World. Well, eternal is a long time – contrary to short time – and our heroine needs some funds for this unique venture, the boys are costly, you know. Support your heroine and pay on-line with your credit card. Any amount of 20 US $ and above welcome. If you commit 100 US $ or above you will get a dinner invitation at Castelgandolfo, the Suzy Size residence slightly outside Pattaya and an interesting plant. It feels so good to do good!

Suzy Size thanks thee an awful lot and is mighty proud of you.