Banking on trees

Financing the Gay World Friendship Tour

By Suzy Size

As you might have known: Money does not grow on trees. And now, that Suzy Size has felt that Wanderlust again, your heroine had to think seriously about how to finance her next few legs of the never ending Gay World Friendship Tour. It is so easy to make travel plans: First your heroine will fly to Mumbai, stay some days there, then fly to Udaipur and start a 21 day trip through Rajastan, visiting places she never even heard the names or has any idea at all what to see there, but she is certainly always on the outlook for spicy Indians and her gaydar will be switched on wide open at all times. Then Agra will follow and then New Delhi. So far the plans are clear, but from there?

Suzy would love to go up to Nepal again to visit her old friend Durian Grey who is expected to be back there then. And afterwards go overland to Tibet and experience Lhasa which might be a bit cold by the beginning of April and is presently closed for foreigners anyhow, but could have reopened by then. If possible your heroine would then take that fantastic new train from Tibet and head down maybe to Laos via Kunming. It is so incredibly easy to make plans, but – another inconvenient truth - more difficult to organize the funds for such adventures. Lets face it: Very few users of this Website have allocated money for the noble cause of your heroine: To travel the whole world and describe it (once and for all) with a truly gay angle. (You still can support the trips of Suzy Size with a donation – see beneath – but your sentinel to the gay world has little hope that she will grab only nearly as much money as Obama did.) Adding insult to injury, the stocks portfolio of your heroine (mainly consisting of Swiss bank titles) has so far lost about 50% of the value and optimism for a speedy recovery is fast evaporating.

Wandering through the luscious gardens of Castelgandolfo, the residence of your heroine slightly outside Pattaya, Suzy Size, full of worries and in the deepest possible thoughts about how to finance the next few legs of her Gay World Friendship Tour, looked at her wonderful plants. Her eyes fell on that strange and beautiful green plant with those fine and numerous branches growing in all possible directions (see picture). She had first seen one of them on Koh Chang years back. She had taken back with her a few branches and put them into pots at first where they quickly took roots. Then – as they grew over time – they received bigger pots and finally were planted in the ground at the secret gardens of Suzy Size who looked over them like the mother you never had. They developed beautifully and the biggest ones are now three meters high. Suzy has never found out what they are called and is grateful for any information leading to the name – add a comment if you have a clue.

Then she laid eyes on her fig trees, bearing fruits. Those were brought in from Switzerland and first grown at Castelgandolfo II, in Nong Khai, fig trees bearing fruits are not normally common in Thailand. Suzy, always a watchful student, had learned from the Thai father in law how to duplicate them through cuttings. The same applied to Australian rosemary which could also be duplicated or cloned through cuttings. Then, again in Koh Chang, your heroine had found a wild pineapple, not eatable, but very beautiful which was also cultivated at her somewhat pompous residence or rather its gardens. Suzy had tried Italian basil, bay leaves. Passion fruits were a huge success, too, having beautiful flowers and tons of fruits. European lemon trees were also part of her gardens and her proudest achievement had been soursop.

A friend had given her a small seed deriving from South America (Brazil). Suzy had planted it and watched it slowly grow over the years. Then, planted in the ground, that tree took off in an incredible speed and now it is a seven meter tall tree bearing big fruits about the size of durian, having similar spikes on the outside. The taste of soursop is intriguing, a bit sour, a lot like mangosteen. The numerous visitors of Castelgandolfo are always very impressed when they see or even get to taste soursop. Suzy, when in Sri Lanka last year, noticed a lot of soursop trees over there. Supposedly they are also cultivated in the South of Thailand and there known as “durian nam” or water durian. Looking at all her rare and precious plants Suzy Size (for once) had an idea: Why not grow all those rare trees and plants and sell them to other enthusiasts in Thailand? The underemployed (should we say: lazy) heartthrob of your heroine could look after them when Suzy is away on the Gay World Tour.

Now Suzy did the maths: She could think of at least 10 different plants she had in her garden that nobody – or nearly nobody – in Thailand had on offer. Funny or beautiful or rare or unknown plants, or plants Thai do not highly estimate. If she could produce 500 plants each per year and sell them at an average price of 500 Baht only she could get a staggering 2.5 Million Baht (with very little money invested). This could easily finance her trips anywhere in the world and spread the newly found wealth down to the good locking boys of every continent (which is the real goal of your heroine). Suzy decided to build a greenhouse. But there were severe obstacles and deadly dangers to be overtaken…

Read next week how they were overcome and how Suzy Size parted for gay India.

Support the Suzy Size World Friendship Tour - pay on-line now – it feels so good to do good

Suzy Size likes her tours all over the world so much, she now plans to go on an eternal World Friendship Tour for Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World. Well, eternal is a long time – contrary to short time – and our heroine needs some funds for this unique venture, the boys are costly, you know. Support your heroine and pay on-line with your credit card. Any amount of 20 US $ and above welcome. If you commit 100 US $ or above you will get a dinner invitation at Castelgandolfo, the Suzy Size residence slightly outside Pattaya and an interesting plant. It feels so good to do good! For payment just go to this link on the internet:

http://www.sparkleserver.net/payment.php

There will be a field with 4 lines.
1. Company: Your name
2. Billing contact E-mail: Supporter has to give in his E-mail address
3: Paying for: Supporter gives in: Place or country Suzy should visit next
4: Amount and currency: Any

And then you can make your payment right there. Suzy Size thanks thee an awful lot and is mighty proud of you. If you are on PayPal just send a mail to and ask how to proceed.