Hitler buys beef - and other meaty tales from gay Zurich

Via South of France and Geneva back to beloved gay Zurich

By Suzy Size, shedding new light on gay Zurich

From Barcelona Suzy Size took a train to Montpellier after queuing for the ticket for one hour and twenty minutes the day before her departure. After a scenic train ride she had quite a bad lunch in Montpellier (Restaurant Terminus) and then proceeded to Les Arcs Draguignan where she was picked up by old journalist friend Sidi who drove your benign heroine to his beautiful house in Cotignac where he lives with his wife Schmauchi during the summer. In winter they will visit Suzy in Castelgandolfo, just slightly outside Pattaya. The above picture is not exactly flattering for the brilliant former journalist, but it must be said, Sidi can indeed be silly at times. Equally silly Suzy staid several days with them, doing, what everybody does in all those beautiful villages in the South of France, remembering the good old times with all that sex, drinking a lot of wine, eating tons of olives and tons of excellent food. So please, gay sex tourist, forgive your lazy heroine, but from the South of France Suzy cannot file any sexy or meaty stories. There are only two openly gay men living in Cotignac, not quite enough for a decent gay infrastructure and some horny (or greedy) money boys. And therefore Cotignac has not yet made it into the Pink Pages of Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World, and probably will never make it there in the foreseeable future. But it is still a nice hamlet.

Suzy boarded another train in direction of Geneva. Even though she is a native Swiss she has never set foot to Geneva before. She is sitting besides a younger good looking man in the train, proofreading her latest travelogue. The man – in his thirties - must be a musician, he reads notes like Suzy reads a book. He seems to peep at the notoriously gay story of your heroine on the computer screen, seems to be interested in that topic. Later, Suzy has changed to a window seat, now facing the musician. She watches him reading his music, but he is not concentrated any longer, he constantly watches Suzy, stares at her with that hungry expression, a bit like Aschenbach. My God, are we back here in the Twenties or Seventies of the last century? Why does he not say something? So Suzy starts a conversation, admittedly not in a very smart manner:

“Are you a musician?”

“Yes.”

“What do you play?”

“The piano.”

Maybe he is not interested and Suzy got it all wrong? This limping conversation is not leading anywhere. So Suzy watches the landscape outside the train window again. But he still watches your heroine, no, stares at her. It is this greedy gay staring, you have seen it all before, dear. So after a while she gives it another try:

”Are you from Geneva?”

”Yes.”

“Where is this hotel located?”

Suzy has shown him her hotel reservation and thus hopefully killed three birds with one stone: He now knows where your heroine is staying and can contact her, if he wants. He also knows her name now, or rather that of Fritzy Frizz under which she will register at the hotel. And she will furthermore get directions how to proceed to that hotel from Geneva train station. Clever, right?

But he does not know that road!!! Suzy gives up on that hopeless closet queen.

When arriving in Geneva she says “Good by” to him and proceeds through customs. He is always three, four meters behind her. When she looks back, he smiles. So Suzy smiles too, but goes on. You had your chance, lad. Then she walks around in the station in search of a map. She cannot find any. And there seem to be only strangers (many blacks) and tourists at that Geneva train station. Who can you ask here for directions? The French of Suzy is not so bad, the whole conversation with that cryptic pianist was in French, after all. But then the pianist is suddenly back, he has grabbed a map somewhere and shows Suzy the location of her hotel which is walking distance from the station. Suzy plays dumb (she is just great at this) and he offers to walk her there. In front of the hotel Suzy asks him, if he would like to have a drink with her? He wants. Suzy quickly puts her bags in her room and is back in no time. But now the pianist has gotten cold feet, he says, he got a call and has to leave at once. Suzy gets his mail address and later sends him a mail, telling him to be less shy, but has never heard of him since and probably never will.

Imagine, seasoned gay sex tourist, the same encounter in Thailand, Malaysia or even the Philippines? In no time the two protagonists would have gone to a hotel room, thrown away the clothes and jumped on each other. But certainly not so in subdued Geneva. The episode seems to be typical for gay Geneva. There is a certain coldness in the city, in the small gay scene, too. Geneva is beautiful, reminds Suzy a lot of her native Zurich, the lake, the river, but there is a certain arrogance here, a certain narrow mindedness. Zurich has become more liberal over the years in any respect, is an open minded city with a flourishing gay life. Suzy has listed a few more gay places for bloating Geneva in the Pink Pages of Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World and in so far her visit to the city of Calvin was worth it, but she does not think, she will ever return here this life again.

Zurich – on the contrary - is full of fascinating people and available meat. One night, after having spent many hours with old friends, Suzy bumped into Mario, a psychiatrist, had two beers with him, then bumped into Urs, an other old friend, had some beers with him, and then Suzy took Yulius from Carrousel home. Yulius is originally from West Timor (where Suzy once was with above mentioned Sidi and Schmauchi on their way to East Timor), but he has lived long in Bali. He there had a restaurant, but his business ventures always seem to fail and he often comes to Zurich for work. He is well over 30, but still good looking and a quite sexy brown Asian boy (Kelvin, you would like him). All the other Indonesian hustlers in Zurich (almost worldwide) know him and accept him as their role model. Suzy enjoyed waking up besides Yulius in the morning and then go for another round to paradise. Your heroine is enthusiastic the whole day after such a good start. She walks through her beloved Zurich with different eyes whilst whistling the starting tune from “Midnight Cowboy”.

“Ah, they now even honor famous pedophiles.”

Suzy thinks this when she passes the memorial for pedagogue Pestalozzi in front of Globus at Bahnhofstrasse.

She enters Jelmoli, another Zurich department store with great food department. She looks first at a super cheap laptop on her way there. A cute vendor with an absolute killer smile explains Suzy that computer and then all the others. Suzy would like to take every part of his in her mouth, licking him just everywhere. She listens carefully to him, but does not understand a word. But she asks a lot of questions just to stay with him a bit longer. Gay sex tourist, when in Zurich, go to Jelmoli and check out that sexy vendor!

But, then Suzy moves on to the famous food department. Besides her Hitler just buys some beef, not human flesh as one could have suspected rightly. Suzy stares at Hitler from the edges of her eyes, trying hard not to appear staring at the famous man. Celebrities like Tina Turner, who also lives in Zurich, appreciate, not being bothered by the general public when they roam the city. Hitler tries hard to look like the actor Bruno Ganz, even copies his mannerisms, but fails to convince Suzy Size and Fritzy Frizz who has a say in this important matter too. When Hitler has gone Suzy purchases a huge veal cutlet (440 grams) and thus ends this latest Zurich episode on another meaty note.

Next week Suzy Size will move on to gay London. Read this exclusively on Stick Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World.

Support the Suzy Size World Friendship Tour - pay on-line now – it feels so good to do good

Suzy Size likes her tour through five Asian countries so much, she now plans to go on an eternal World Friendship Tour for Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World. Well, eternal is a long time – contrary to short time – and our heroine needs some funds for this unique venture, the boys are costly, you know. Support your heroine and pay on-line with your credit card. Any amount of 20 US $ and above welcome. If you commit 100 US $ or above you will get a dinner invitation at Castelgandolfo, the Suzy Size residence slightly outside Pattaya. It feels so good to do good! For payment just go to this link on the internet:

http://www.sparkleserver.net/payment.php

There will be a field with 4 lines.

1. Company: Your name

2. Billing contact E-mail: Supporter has to give in his E-mail address

3: Paying for: Supporter gives in: Place or country Suzy should visit next

4: Amount and currency: Any

And then you can make your payment right there. Suzy Size thanks thee an awful lot and is proud of you.