Articles - Thailand

Past Thursday was Mothers Day. What, you did not know that? Forgot it again? It takes place every August 12th. At least in Thailand. This is the birthday of the queen and mothers day is therefore a holiday.
”I will tell Mr. Mon, the gardener”, Suzy Size said to Khun Amorn, the boyfriend of so many years.
”No, need, Thai people know about these things.”
Do they?
And, indeed, the gardener knew and did not show up for work accidentally. Read more

In Pattaya many Farangs seem to suffer from lack of attention. To counter that terrible feeling of neglect by the world, they group some money boys around themselves in Jomtien beach or even open up a gay bar. The staff, those paid boys, will listen to what that eloquent Farang has to say in carefully chosen English terms. HE is here on a mission. But few of those Farangs realize that those simple Thai boys do not understand a quarter of what that so terribly important Farang has to say… Read more

Tragedy did strike this week at Castelgandolfo, the somewhat pompous residence of your gay heroine Suzy Size, located just slightly outside Pattaya. Emptiness could be felt inside the house and out in the luscious gardens surrounding Castelgandolfo. It felt as if the sun stopped shining, the birds stopped singing and the world stopped turning when Khun Amorn, the lazy boy friend of your heroine, delivered the bad news to Suzy Size in an unceremonious way whilst she was repotting some of her precious plants: “Bobby has died already.” Read more

Not much to complain about, but not much happening either. Suzy Size is a bit bored these days. The Pattaya routine has your heroine in its tight grip. Saturday is the highlight, it is beach day. But last week it started raining shortly after her arrival. And the Mia Noi was in Bangkok. No sex then, there was nobody else in sight right on Jomtien in the rain. Does it matter? Not really. Next Saturday is in the pipeline of the Pattaya routine. Read more

Khun M, a former Funny Boy, has opened Happy Place this week. The soft opening was Monday night and a curious crowd gathered to get a first impression of the brand new go-go-bar. It is located in Pattayaland Soi 2, where - at one stage of Pattaya history - Bubbles, the then most mundane girly go-go, was located. The new management has heavily invested into the technical equipment, the lighting, sound system, bubble and smoke machines are all brand new and state of the art. Read more

Your old heroine can still be spontaneous, last Saturday morning she called the Malaysia hotel in Bangkok and made a reservation for that very night. Occupation of hotels all over Thailand is not very high these days, so one even can get a room at normally so well booked Malaysia at short notice for a dirty weekend. (Sorry, Eduard, to have borrowed your term “dirty weekend” without paying any royalties, but it really describes the plan so accurately.) Suzy Size grabbed her tooth brush, the shaver, some condoms, a shirt and one underwear and off she was in the drivers seat. Read more

Suzy Size was recently invited to the 6th anniversary party of Funny Boys and the 3rd anniversary of Mamasan Rose. Tim and Lud, the owners of Funny Boys and Panorama, both located in the unique Pattaya Boyztown, regularly invite their customers to such events. As usual, they offered a buffet and the first drink on the house. And – no surprise – Funny Boys was packed that eventful night. The Funny Boys for the very first time presented a show and Tim and Lud first raffled away presents to their customers and later generous cash gifts to all their employees: Up to 5000 Baht. A vote was held to find the Best Smile, Best Dancer and Most Handsome, prices being donated by Khun James. Read more

Suzy Size has known Andy Wenger, the owner of Swiss House Restaurant in Soi Diamond, for many, many years. He has opened said place eleven years ago and kept the quality of the food and the service up at all times. Whenever your heroine comes back from one of her grand voyages, she is always glad to pay Andy and his place a visit. It feels like coming home in a double sense: Coming home to Pattaya and talk over the newest gossip about town and people. Read more

As you might have noticed, beloved user of Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World, Suzy Size can be quite talkative at times. Your heroine is madly in love with gay gossip of all sorts and hardly any time can resist to spread vicious (or non vicious) rumors. But this time around her lips were sealed for once. For several months Suzy knew something you probably did not know, but now it is time to reveal it to you out there in the snow: Make three out of one. Read more

Almost always you can see your heroine reading a book on Jomtien beach – looking up from it once in a while to make her so important observations. Patrick brought her a book from Switzerland, the latest and last of Hugo Loetscher who recently died shortly before his 80th birthday. The scheduled honors planned for his birthday in Zurich had to be cancelled. Hugo Loetscher was a world famous writer, in Switzerland at least. Suzy has known him for over thirty years. In the beginning he tried several times to get your then so young heroine in his bed at the hunting grounds of Odeon Cafe, but had no success. About fourteen years ago he paid her a visit in Bangkok and they went to famous Babylon together… Read more

Suzy Size had a splendid time when revisiting gay Chiang Mai recently. The scene has increased enormously in the last few years. Have a look at the Pink Pages of Sticky Rice Gay Guide Asia and Gay Guide World. All those different massage places alone are very inviting. Suzy was sitting in her room and checked them all out thanks to Wifi. Was she going over to Lavender Lanna massage? River House Massage looked inviting, too. But first she went for a walk. Since Suzy was walking near Classic House that fair afternoon, she decided to give it another try, never change a winning horse, your heroine has been here before and then came out very satisfied. Read more

Suzy Size got her act together and fled the boredom of her self inflicted hibernation in Pattaya. Rumor had it that a fantastic new gay hotel had opened in Chiang Mai. With over 100 rooms, dedicated massage boys, show, 24 hours restaurant this sounded heavenly. So your horny heroine was curious as always, wanted to know the truth, see for herself, shed fact from fiction and booked an inexpensive flight up there. Read more

Walking towards Boyztown in broad daylight Suzy Size noted some bubbles. This formerly straight Go Go Bar has changed its sexual orientation overnight and has become gay, but the décor has remained the same. Bubbles bode well for straight or gay sex it seems. And then, a little later, your benign heroine walked past Ambiance, it was about 2 pm. A few boys at Boyz Gym were diligent and offered massage. The other ones inside that formidable Gym came out as well, all eager offering their priceless services. Read more

One major change, however, was noticeable, there were many more young Gothois (lady boys) out there this year. For instance a now fifteen year old nephew of Khun Amorn who acts effeminate since he was five years of age. Another very young nephew is not sure yet if he may join the Gothoi Association of Nong Khai, but to the seasoned eyes of Suzy Size it looks like that.
One cute very young Gothoi who had caught an old and really ugly farang already flirted restlessly with your heroine behind the back of said man. Suzy was flattered, but was more interested in the manly rowers which were themselves busy with the famous boat races and not into hanky panky right now.
Suzy surely will see some of them back in Jomtien beach. Read more

If some of your friends have problems remembering things or names – who does not at your age? – they are ideal candidates for a joke of yours. You just ask them a simple question: What was the first name of Alzheimer? Everybody has heard of the world famous medical doctor, of course, who gave his name to the terrible disease that wipes out your memory, but nobody can remember his first name. Try it, it always works. So is the newest addition to fine dining restaurants of Pattaya “Alois” named after the Bavarian doctor? No, of course not, it has its name from Alois X. Fassbind (1935 – 1998) who was a fun loving and very able man. Read more

Our friends at the gay Ambiance hotel have well taken care of the low season this year. They have renovated all their rooms which now are more elegant than ever and are ready for the upcoming high season. Have a look at their brand new rooms right here. Read more

But then the girl at the Russian embassy wanted to see a certain form, an invitation by some organization in Russia, some sort of guarantee. Suzy had no clue what they meant. But – as always in Thailand – when there is a problem, there is also a solution. A certain Thai gentleman offered his services. He needed 4500 Baht for that “invitation” and it would take 15 minutes. Suzy made that deal, what choice did she have if she really wanted to go to Moscow? That precious form arrived soon after and her visa could be processed for another 2000 Baht (roughly) in one week.
If only Suzy had known Dimitry then, she could have saved that money for worthier causes, for instance a well bestowed Russian escort.
But Suzy was going to meet Dimitry only after her arrival in Moscow… Read more

I had up to now never stayed at View Talay Villas, but a good friend has recommended them as gay friendly. So since I like to try something new all the time, I booked my most recent visit to Pattaya with them. All their Villas (one, two and three bedrooms are available) have a private pool in their secluded, lush gardens. After a day in Jomtien I often took a new beach or massage boy with me, it is only a five minutes walk from Pattaya gay beach… Read more

Suzy Size is laying naked on a bed, face down. It is nice here, quiet. The air conditioning has cooled down this comfortable room, outside in Boyztown it is unbearably hot and humid. It is the rainy season again, Suzy hardly can go to the gay Pattaya beach these days with all those nasty downpours. In fact your heroine is very busy lately. You guessed right, her grand China trip is looming. So many things have to be organized for that trip and plants moved from smaller pots to bigger ones in the greenhouse of Castelgandolfo at the last minute. It feels good to be caressed by thoughtful, tender hands. Right now Tong works on the left foot of your heroine, soon he will move up the left leg. Read more

George is that typical New York investment banker. Always bloating, always knowing best and extremely demanding when it comes to services rendered to him. He is extremely difficult to please, be assured. If you ever had the very mixed pleasure of sitting near him on Jomtien beach, you must have overheard all his endless monologs – he has a very loud voice - about his incredibly successful career, his cleverness, his untold abilities and of course his whole sex life which started at the tender age of 12... Read more